Browsing All posts tagged under »FRANK«


July 27, 2009


“How was your day?” asked Lili. “I went to see my therapist, Bradbury,” I said. “And?” *** “Tonight, the insect population is not happy with me,” I told Bradbury. “To them I am the devil.” “The devil?” he asked. “Earlier today I crept outside and knelt before a kingdom of ants on the north-eastern border […]


July 22, 2009


Operator: You have reached the Writers In Crisis Hot-line. If you are a fiction writer, press one. If you are a non-fiction writer, press two. If you write poems, press one. If you write prose, press two. If you write short stories, press one. If you write longer works of fiction, press two. If you […]


July 13, 2009


2:11:22 PM  Tim-Job: Yes, but you still should have asked me if you wanted to write me into your story. 2:12:16 PM  Frank Sauce: I feel like that would have ruined the fabric of the story. It would have felt fake. 2:15:15 PM  Tim-Job: It’s a fictional story. 2:16:43 PM  Frank Sauce: So, I’m sorry. […]

To Do

July 9, 2009


TO DO LIST: – find therapist – clean bathroom – read chapter of novel – buy coffee – write decent blog post “Hi, I’m calling about uh, trying to find a therapist.” “Yes sir, I think we can help you.” “I’m looking for someone to talk to.” “What is the nature of your problems.” “I […]

The Muse

July 6, 2009


THE SOUND OF A PHONE BEING ANSWERED AFTER MANY RINGS… Kendra: Motivational Urge Support Enterprises, my name is Kendra how may I help you? Frank: Ah, hi, yes. I was just calling about your service, the muse service you provide. I read about it in the paper. Kendra: Yes, miss, what would you like to […]

On Writing

July 1, 2009


Dear Mrs.Hinton, My name is Andrew Aston and I am a grade 6 student living in Edmonton Alberta. I have failed grade 6 this year and if I am going to grade 7 I need to complete a short story for summer school. When I Googled “this sucks”, your website was the first on the […]


June 25, 2009


Dear Mr.Hinton, We thought it was clear in our last communication, that you would cease all publications on your “blog.” As previously discussed, you were to change the name of your blog or delete it altogether. Since our last meeting, you have done neither. As you know, Steinfeld’s Ltd is planning to release their new […]